Memories from Ornaments - #1

 Many many years ago, in the world of an angry little girl, a story was told...

When my daughter was 5, she got very angry with her brother. Yes, most siblings fight, but this time was different. She was so angry that she said hurtful things. Yes, most siblings do, but this time was different.

My daughter looked at her older brother and said, "I wish you were never adopted. I wish you were still in Russia and had never been brought into my family."

I was floored, shocked, and hurt. Since I am adopted, I tend to overreact when I hear comments like this... People don't always think about the words they use, I have experienced a lot of ignorant people over the years since I have one adopted son and two biological children.

So, I sat her down... I had planned to punish her, but off the cuff I changed my mind.

"Jess~ It is time that I was honest with you... See, we told Alex when he was five, and now you are five so it is time. You are adopted. When you say ugly things to your brother, you are inflicting pain on all adopted children. You hurt me and you hurt Alex, but now you need to know that you are hurting yourself. Yes, we flew on planes and took a train and a bus to get your brother - but we had to ride on a spaceship to get you. You were adopted from the planet Hogbath in the galaxy Ummmdidd. (I know that is ridiculous - it was off the cuff). You were a lizard princess, and we had to teach you English. We loved Alex before we ever knew him, and we loved you before we ever knew you. See, God knew that Alex would be our son. He prepared him for us and our hearts for him. Then, God knew that we needed a daughter, and He prepared you for us and our hearts for you."

she was floored - she looked at me trying to figure out if I was lying or what - the story seemed far-fetched, but I am completely convincing - she was not sure

I dropped it. Three months later, I was chatting with Leslie. As women do, we were talking about labor pains, deliveries, and comparing stories. I said something like "when I was pregnant with Jessie - " but before I could get another word out of my mouth, Jess ran into the room
 "I KNEW IT! I KNEW I WASN'T ADOPTED"...

We laughed until I cried.

That Christmas, Leslie and her family brought this ornament to my Jessica. On the belly of the bejeweled lizard it reads, To Jessica, our favorite lizard princess... We laugh every Christmas as we put it on our tree.

We have talked about it for 10 years now.  It reminds me of so many life lessons... Be careful what you say because words can hurt. God did choose my children for me, one in my heart and two from my belly. Adopted children are planned, chosen, and wanted in this family. All three of my children are adopted by God and loved by me... I thank Him for entrusting me with three of His little wonders.

...Preschool Teacher....

I love my job

I could say that the money is amazing and the benefits are incredible...
yet, that would be seriously stretching the truth.

I could say that I get paid to sit on my butt all day and do nothing...
yet, that would be untrue.

However, I can say that I work with some great ladies. Most of my closest friends in Durham have come into my life through my job. They are hard working women who love their families, enjoy their job, and make me laugh almost daily. They make me smile. They let me vent about life. They challenge me and hold me accountable. They pray for me when I ask. We go to lunch, meet for suppers, hit thrift stores, and have even vacationed together.

I can also say that I love hearing the stories that my students bring me each day... "Daddy snores when he is on the couch", "Mommy, drinks and watches movies all day", "I have a pet elephant that sleeps with me", or "my dog pooped down the air vent this morning"....  My kids crack me up. Their innocence and candor are invigorating. Their timing is perfect.... On a day that I am sad or tired, a student will remind me that they love me, or compliment my shirt (which is the exact same as every other teacher on staff) and bring a smile to my lips. On a silly day, my students will laugh at my crazy socks, Halloween costume, funny songs, or crazy way I dance during class. The reasons I walk into my job each morning are all between the ages of one and 5 years old...

I have a lot in my life to be thankful for - Today, I am choosing to remind myself that many will get up Monday morning dreading their work day... I will not have to do that.

I love my job

God thought differently

In the spring of 2005, I had a thought... I have always loved to argue. I always want to be right. I feel the need to fight my point... so, I wanted to go back to school to study law. I started making plans to go back to school... I saw dollar bills in my future.

but God thought differently

Early in the year, I traveled to Thailand for a wonderful mission trip. I felt like God was getting ready to change some major things in my life. I was sick on the trip, but some of the food we ate was scary looking. Several people got the tummy bug, so I knew that I had caught it as well.

but God thought differently

After years of infertility drugs, our adoption of our firstborn, and then our surprise birth of our second born, I had finally convinced my hubby that it was time for him to go get a vasectomy. Our family was good and complete. My kids were in school, so I could go back to work/school. We were done with diapers.

but God thought differently

Eleven days before the scheduled vasectomy, Scott found a pregnancy test under the sink. We joked about how we would never need it again. However, we said we shouldn't throw it away because that would be wasteful. So as a joke, the next morning I took the test knowing it would be one line, and then I could toss it.

but God thought differently

I was quite mad. My life had been perfect. I knew what I wanted and where I wanted our family to go. I had my future planned out, and this little surprise was not in the plan.


It is hard to think about these facts. As I look back over the past nine hilarious years with my professor, I can not believe that he was not planned... well, planned by me.

God had Caleb Walker Sublett in His plan. He knew that I needed a brilliant young 3yr old to explain to me at 6:15am one morning that platypus have electro-reception and can move around in murky waters similar to how bats fly at night. God knew that I would need a little one to compliment me daily and intently mean every word he spoke. He knew that Caleb would amaze and humor people every where he visits. God was aware of the teachers who would marvel at his vocabulary, yet be enamored by his charm. God knew that one day in third grade, Caleb would sit several of his friends down at recess so that he could explain to them that Jesus loved them so much that He had sent the Holy Spirit down as Living Water.

God thought differently

God knew that I needed Caleb. I had no idea.

I need to learn from this... I am so flippin' hard-headed. When things do not turn out the way I PLANNED, I need to step back and know that it has happened to me before... and God is sovereign. He knows what He is doing. It may take a few years, but I will be able to look back and see that even though He thought differently that HE WAS RIGHT.

My little one was born 5.5 weeks early. He was 5 pounds and so little. He was long and skinny. He was deaf from his birth to just before Christmas (that is an entirely different blog and a huge miracle story). He had to stay in the hospital a week in order to get strong enough to come home. He came into this world so tiny and frail... but God knew differently - Caleb is a strong kid with a tender heart. He is passionate and smart.

I needed a professor in my life.... so God gave me Caleb.